Wendilicious
Moi
Teach. Sing. Write. Fly. Dive. Rave.
I'm not the girl your mom warned you about, her imagination was never this good.
Work for pasta and ice cream and also makes pasta and ice cream work for me.
Ecoutez
More of me
1/4/17, 6:20 AM
My last birthday
I remember that day very vividly. It was kinda a few days before my birthday. About this time last year. I remember being excited to meet the 2 best friends that I had. I flew down to Clarke Quek. Our busy schedules always left us in separate worlds but once a month we er to drink together and find new food plces together.I remember how sore I felt after Quin left, how I was dragging myself because I enjoyed the physical presence of Loken and yet I knew I couldn't get over the love I had for Q. I sat by the river and I remember Carissa being worried for me for I have thinned from having diahorrea for a month. My body regurgitating and going against life because it felt broken inside and out. I was alive, but barely living.
I remember sitting my the river and telling Carissa about how I've been, trying to hide the tears and pains of how I was feeling. I remember holding back everything that I wanted to say because I knew we all had our own worries and problems on hand. I knew we were all swimming against the tide in our own way. I remember the smell of the water while we sat on the steps waiting for Daphne. I had so much in that moment. I loved that moment. While it was painful to have lost, in that moment I had you, Carissa.
After 40mins, Daphne popped out from the corner of my eye with a tcc paperbox and inside, revealing a melted lava cake with a falling candle. She couldn't find a lighter and the nearest TCC was super far away. They did that for me. I was so touched. I could barely hold back what felt like the greatest surprise in my life. We laughed so hard at how sloppy the cake was and blew the non existent candle. They then handed me a vintage coin pouch that contained an itouch. We didn't have money, and they got me a secondhand itouch and made a playlist of songs for me to help get over Quin. I remember many apps in the itouch like Psych and Carousell. They knew I wanted to play Psych with them. In that moment I burst into tears. They aren't friends who can romanticize anything. I've never gotten much words from these girls in terms of affirmation for our friendship but they always know how to show me and make me feel special.
This makes me recall back on the one performance when C and D surprised me and stayed back in school for. When they absolutely hate staying in school. We drank that night away after a huge screw up in the sound system. They said that they were still proud of me.
Bouncing back to that birthday, Carissa was reaching the end, I didn't know. She couldn't drink and was monitored by her family all the time. But she came out, she stayed late, for me. We drank a few rounds. Shots I had. Free drinks the whole night for the bartender had a crush on us. Carissa had wine while we had a whole array of strange drinks that kept coming my way.
She left early.
Her father came and fetched her.
She left early.
I miss her so much.